Kopi-Oh Times

How Many Invitations Do I Need to Reject Before I Stop Receiving Them?

Every now and then I will receive invitations to catchup with my old friends and ex-colleagues. As much as I can, I would always try to make myself available, and often I did.

There will be times that I don’t feel like going, but I still dragged myself there. There are also times that I just readily agreed and enjoy myself when I am there.

I used to organize gatherings as such. I will call people up one by one and ask them if they are free. I will make extra efforts to ensure that I get the most headcounts for each gathering that I initiated.

There are people whom I always call, but never turn up. There are people who turn up, but I know they are not really enjoying. There are also people who turn up and geniunely enjoyed the whole event.

As time goes by, I put those people who don’t turn up into my blacklist. I never call them up to ask if they are free. For those who don’t really enjoy, I will still call up, but I won’t insist them to come. As for those who enjoy, it goes without saying, I will always call them up.

I don’t have any problem with people telling me upfront that “Sorry, it’s boring. I won’t be there.” but I have a lot of problem when I hear “I can’t make it. I have something on.” cos I know that the reply is not genuine. 

So just recently, another friend who always volunteer himself to organize such a gathering, got another huge disappointment. He initiated the event 2 weeks before the actual day. Only a small handful of people replied and I can tell how disappointed he is. Cos this is not the first time it happened.

It really makes me wonder: “How many invitations does one need to reject before they never get invited again”.

Probably these people are meant to be just acquiantance.